a love to kill

i'm begining to wonder, why does korean dramas have to be sad and draggy? they can never seem to do away with this tear-jerking edge.

you know it's the same ol' story told before, you know someone's gonna die, you what to expect, who's gonna be with who, and yet you literally keep your eyes glued to the screen, painstakingly follow the chinese subtitles which you can't catch half the time.

what makes you so intrigued and mesmerized is the male lead in the screen. close to perfection, and so full of character...

you're so driven by the thot of yourself being the female lead, of whom he kissed, hugged, and talked to. you begin to wonder, "how i wish i had a love like that". but, the other half of your more sensible self reminds you that you can only dream of it, because it never happens in reality.

it's shows like that which stands in your way- from being down to earth and realistic. but it's never wrong to fantasize right? what's wrong with being dreamy and idealistic for just a few moments.

i'm a self-proclaimed realist but my friends will think otherwise. before them, i can't stop bragging abt the love story i just read, the sad drama i just watched days ago, the latest tunes i've fell in love with. i even name some of them my husband of boyfriend....whatever intimate relationships possible. cute guys, rich brats, talented dudes....whichever category they fall into....

Sad to say, songs are songs, stories can only be stories. at the end of the day, it all comes down to you and your lonely self. how many times can you tell yourself it's ok, i'd sure find someone, someday. i'm not jealous, really. i don't care if other people are doing better than me. i have my friends, i'm not alone.

Right, your life's cool. nvm the hiccups along the way. somehow you'll make it on your own. nvm if it's boring, so long as you're alive, it's ok. But that's not what i want. the truth is, i don't wana lead an ordinary life. i wana meet someone, fall in love, fall out of it and be hurt, and then recover from it. that's pretty sick for some people cus no one likes the feeling. to me, it's an experience cus i've nv been hurt before by the people i love. at least i know i'm protected, and even the relationships i had before, i was probably the one who hurt them.

i really wish that life's like in the movies.....

the kind which u'll lie on your deathbed and reminisce about whatever heartbreaking events happened to you and the one you love.......the kind that can be penned into a sad love story which can make people cry.