Like what my favourite jm says, we have this horrible disease.
for her, it's like she'll feel sleepy everytime she reads her notes.
for me, i have a huge issue with prioritizing my study time. the worse is when i know what is going on and am aware of how it can destroy me...OMG.
you know i always tell people i can only study at home, which is true, cus i'm not one who can tolerate noise from a buncha sec school bratz or put up with the smell of french fries when i mug. the last time i tried doing that, i think i was that exact buncha annoying sec sch bratz i talked about, who apparently set out to mug there....but end up reading the same sentence over and over again, or laughing away over don't know what...being a complete nuisance. at the end of the day when i got home, i was full with a whole stomach of fries, no knowledge nothing.
Ironically, studying at home has become a problem for me these days. i'm so convinced that i work better at home because of my past experiences, and very much because of where it got me now. but these days, i can't....which i don't know why.
i cannot understand why is it so challenging for me to sit still and concentrate for like 15 mins. for every page i read, i spend half an hour surfing the net, roll on my sister's bed [oops], or walk around the house. and then there's the hunger pangs whenever i start to mug. i spend like 10 mins figuring out what i should eat, another 10 eating, and then maybe settle to study for a short while....the bloody cycle goes on...like forever...this is damn serious.
it's times like these, when you're not supposed to be doing such stuff, that you will most likely end up doing them. i don't know, maybe it's just me. maybe it worked for me the other time cus the consequences were more intense. either way, it's not good.
sometimes i secretly wish that youtube, crunchyroll and all that video sharing websites are down so that i won't be spending time on them. HAHA. but i think people like cherine, glynis and whoever will hate me for that. then again i may end up eating more. HA HA HA...aiya whatever.
Oh anyways, a break before my next paper on thurs after tommorow. this sentence, is a very bad example of a clear and concise form of media writing. haha....
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Monday, November 26, 2007
One degree 15
MY SMASHING Sunday @
ONE Degree 15
Dad and Uncle Simon: they're the reason for the car decal on our car's windscreen. heee~~~~
Mommy looks so cool looking intensely at something. but i'd reckon her Dior specs are cooler. HAHA. and the grey object behind....you don't wana know. 
My 'army' of cousins and relatives...and my cute granny.
yes we can all READ, meimei.
She smile like she own the yatches lor. woah you should've seen those kick-ass yatches there owned by some filthy rich balding men. [ok maybe not balding lah, i'm just jealous...] LOL. we saw really young ang-mo kids clad in luminous diving suits running around their dad's yatch...wth, we run around the void deck at their age lor.
this person don't know how to take picture can, the view behind is like as if we're at johore port. MY TIAN AH.....
woah...this cool or what?! then again if you think about it, the pool will be a cocktail of orange juice, punch and maybe some vodkha by night. eeew... 
THIS, is even cooler! my dream MAHJONG table. auto shuffle and stacking. this is what i call EFFECIENCY!
SMILE!!!
aaww...the ultra comfy sofa...
The nostalgic backview is totally cool!From top left: Roger, twin 1, me and FeFe
Don't need to guess, so the entire day was spent outside with my family, cept for the going back home to change part. haahaa... yeah i KNOW i should be studying but i'd sell my soul, no, TIME for a buffet dinner.
Saturday, November 24, 2007
If you ever have the slightest interest to take a trip down the Kpop scene, then i'm pretty sure you'll come to appreciate it's wonders....of cus, that is if you pick the right ones.
i don't mean DBSK or FTTS only....there are actually truckloads of talents waiting to be discovered. i assure you, they are ANYTHING but mere packaged pretty faces....some are really far from pretty..[despite having gone under the knife]. haha...but i gotta applaud their innate talents man...
One thing i cannot resist, is that unique husky voice they have [the guys]. i don't know how to explain it except that it's their very distinct korean way of singing ballads....omg.... i'm officially gonna coin it the "KIMCHI voice"! lol.
a couple of singers who qualify under this cateory include:
-Fany [Hwan hee]
-Hong Ki [FT Island]
-Howl
-Uknow [DBSK]
-Dae sung [BigBang]
ummm..if you know them then you'll get my point....
and i totally dig the korean-style of rapping though i couldn't make out what they were rapping most of the time. it's a hell lot of difference compared to the mando-way....[all of them suck cept for 'Machi'] lol.
If you don't know Epik high, you MUST know BigBang.
haha....it doesn't even matter if you don't understand what they're singing man....the best thing about Korean music [or other foreign music for that matter] is that they capture you purely from the way they sound. but if you really wana know...you can find out from the translations in the millions of websites online.
my true love is still dbsk. BUT, i'm starting to love BigBang too...they're a whole different genre....a whole different story. not your typical prettyboys. a bag full of talent i must say. if you wana know why, go look at these music videos....
i don't mean DBSK or FTTS only....there are actually truckloads of talents waiting to be discovered. i assure you, they are ANYTHING but mere packaged pretty faces....some are really far from pretty..[despite having gone under the knife]. haha...but i gotta applaud their innate talents man...
One thing i cannot resist, is that unique husky voice they have [the guys]. i don't know how to explain it except that it's their very distinct korean way of singing ballads....omg.... i'm officially gonna coin it the "KIMCHI voice"! lol.
a couple of singers who qualify under this cateory include:
-Fany [Hwan hee]
-Hong Ki [FT Island]
-Howl
-Uknow [DBSK]
-Dae sung [BigBang]
ummm..if you know them then you'll get my point....
and i totally dig the korean-style of rapping though i couldn't make out what they were rapping most of the time. it's a hell lot of difference compared to the mando-way....[all of them suck cept for 'Machi'] lol.
If you don't know Epik high, you MUST know BigBang.
haha....it doesn't even matter if you don't understand what they're singing man....the best thing about Korean music [or other foreign music for that matter] is that they capture you purely from the way they sound. but if you really wana know...you can find out from the translations in the millions of websites online.
my true love is still dbsk. BUT, i'm starting to love BigBang too...they're a whole different genre....a whole different story. not your typical prettyboys. a bag full of talent i must say. if you wana know why, go look at these music videos....
***Those in Italics are HIGHLY recommended. =)
Lies:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57GPGTOwSPE
La La La:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g5euBa7m-ic
We belong together:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeNDF-EI0Ck
Forever with you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRotrwEKjrY
Dirty Cash:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bt-F-rmOYM
This Love [G Dragon solo]:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHaWvR7AWR4
Fool's Tears:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g5euBa7m-ic
...their music simply grows in you...
Thursday, November 22, 2007
The pair of winter boots to DIE for this season....
LIMTED EDITION
Puma by MIHARAYASUHIRO
CHIOness....
The price is so CHIO it makes me wana weep
They cost a freaking S$399.
it's quite worth it considering the fact that fefe's not gonna buy anymore shoes for the next 3 years....
P.S.: FEFE, when you come back from Japan right, you can wrap it up and put it under our Xmas tree...and repeat this again for the next few christmases.
...win already lor...
Monday, November 19, 2007
beloved JANICE [smelly] TAN..
HAPPY MERRY 21st!!!
[though i doubt you'll honestly feel the excitement amidst the stacks notes]
lol
Are u ready for your surprise?????
.
..
..
.
.
.
..
.
..
...
..
.
.
.jpg)
PRETTIEST!!!!
i swear beneath all the STARS that i'm gonna help you out for your SLUMBER PARTY!!!! lol.... for you i'm gonna wear the ugliest PJs to make you look AWESOME that night. LOL!!! so please don't invite any cute guys.
..and i'm sure there won't be many. =)))))
last but not least...
your present won't be just a pair of undies.... =DDDDDDDDD
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
10 Unglam Facts about your little friend here...
1) i have this little pillow with me when i sleep since i was 2. and YES, it's still safe and sound on my bed now. and it's NOT smelly! [at least to me... =D]
2) i once puked right outside my lift landing when i had food poisoning and my mom had to clean up the entire place at 1 am.
3) when i was 9, i disected an 8cm long earthworm with my badminton raquet. i think it's karma cus ever since i visited this grosteque earthworm farm in aussie, they became my worst NIGHTMARE.
4) i used to bite myself a lot on my arms when i was very young, until one of my aunties threaten me with something which i can't even remember. i stopped. my mom say it looks as if i was tortured at home.
5) i have this disgusting habit of stuffing used tissue paper under my pillow when i have flu years ago. then when my tissue paper runs out, i'd just grab those underneath my pillow to reuse. WAHAHAHAHAHAA..OMG!!! i can't believe i just told u THIS!!! [THIS HABIT IS SO KICKED ALREADY. so please get over it after reading] =DDDD
6) when i was younger, my nose used to bleed a lot. there was once in the middle of the night, i thought i had runny-nose, so i just used my hands to wipe off my nose. then i realised howcome it's like so watery and it kept flowing. so i wanted to go out and get tissue. i freaked out when i saw so much blood on the tissue. when my mom turned on the light. my door knob, the floor and my pillow was pretty much covered with blood. quite a bloody sight.
7) Muffy once had indigestion and he must have felt real uneasy. so he climbed onto my bed and slept next to me. the next thing i know, he puked. it was 7plus in the morning god dammit! i just grabbed a towel in my drawer, covered it and went back to sleep. i was THAT tired.
8) In MI, i once shared a toilet cubicle with every girl's worst night mare, a HUGE COCKROACH. i just couldn't be bothered lah, and what the hell is so scary about them??? they're not even slimy....and i could still remember the shocking look on some mina's faces when i came out. i so wanted to say "yes i ATE IT!!"
9) i plotted the death of this dirt sucking fish in my dad's 4 feet tank with my mom. HA HA!! cus you know why?! apparently the tank was SO clean it had nothing to feed on anymore and it started eating off the other fishes! @#$%^...
it grew SO HUGE it became a bloody sin to let it continue growing at the expense of the poor fishes. SO, [heh heh heh] we took like an hour trying to scoop it out of the tank then put it in a seperate pail and treated it to some dettol. we were quite apalled that it survived a whole 3 days, but it eventually died [of hunger i think]. SHIT lah, wasted my dettol.
10) this is quite disgusting. in my sec school days, i love eating the sour cream n onion flavour pringles. so i was happily eating and watching tv. i have this habit of licking off the sour cream and lay the chips on a piece of tissue before eating them later. i must have stacked the chips quite high already then my dad came walking out. man....the fan must have dried them all and my dad just picked one up and ate it. OMFG...my eyes widened so much i felt dizzy and the world must have been switched to slow-motion mode when i witness the piece of chip enter my dad's mouth. and you know what he said? "you buy original one ah?"
and i quickly chucked the tube of SOUR CREAM n ONION chips behind me.."YAR". i can't believe i said that. i only confessed a few months ago. =X
2) i once puked right outside my lift landing when i had food poisoning and my mom had to clean up the entire place at 1 am.
3) when i was 9, i disected an 8cm long earthworm with my badminton raquet. i think it's karma cus ever since i visited this grosteque earthworm farm in aussie, they became my worst NIGHTMARE.
4) i used to bite myself a lot on my arms when i was very young, until one of my aunties threaten me with something which i can't even remember. i stopped. my mom say it looks as if i was tortured at home.
5) i have this disgusting habit of stuffing used tissue paper under my pillow when i have flu years ago. then when my tissue paper runs out, i'd just grab those underneath my pillow to reuse. WAHAHAHAHAHAA..OMG!!! i can't believe i just told u THIS!!! [THIS HABIT IS SO KICKED ALREADY. so please get over it after reading] =DDDD
6) when i was younger, my nose used to bleed a lot. there was once in the middle of the night, i thought i had runny-nose, so i just used my hands to wipe off my nose. then i realised howcome it's like so watery and it kept flowing. so i wanted to go out and get tissue. i freaked out when i saw so much blood on the tissue. when my mom turned on the light. my door knob, the floor and my pillow was pretty much covered with blood. quite a bloody sight.
7) Muffy once had indigestion and he must have felt real uneasy. so he climbed onto my bed and slept next to me. the next thing i know, he puked. it was 7plus in the morning god dammit! i just grabbed a towel in my drawer, covered it and went back to sleep. i was THAT tired.
8) In MI, i once shared a toilet cubicle with every girl's worst night mare, a HUGE COCKROACH. i just couldn't be bothered lah, and what the hell is so scary about them??? they're not even slimy....and i could still remember the shocking look on some mina's faces when i came out. i so wanted to say "yes i ATE IT!!"
9) i plotted the death of this dirt sucking fish in my dad's 4 feet tank with my mom. HA HA!! cus you know why?! apparently the tank was SO clean it had nothing to feed on anymore and it started eating off the other fishes! @#$%^...
it grew SO HUGE it became a bloody sin to let it continue growing at the expense of the poor fishes. SO, [heh heh heh] we took like an hour trying to scoop it out of the tank then put it in a seperate pail and treated it to some dettol. we were quite apalled that it survived a whole 3 days, but it eventually died [of hunger i think]. SHIT lah, wasted my dettol.
10) this is quite disgusting. in my sec school days, i love eating the sour cream n onion flavour pringles. so i was happily eating and watching tv. i have this habit of licking off the sour cream and lay the chips on a piece of tissue before eating them later. i must have stacked the chips quite high already then my dad came walking out. man....the fan must have dried them all and my dad just picked one up and ate it. OMFG...my eyes widened so much i felt dizzy and the world must have been switched to slow-motion mode when i witness the piece of chip enter my dad's mouth. and you know what he said? "you buy original one ah?"
and i quickly chucked the tube of SOUR CREAM n ONION chips behind me.."YAR". i can't believe i said that. i only confessed a few months ago. =X
***TAG or COMMENT SOMETHING UNGLAM ABOUT YOURSELF LEH! WHOEVER YOU ARE!***
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
8 DAYS every week~
there is only like umm, 7 days in a week? why did they call the magazine 8 days?? huh, can you please enlighten me??? why 8 days huh???? can count or not? Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday = SEVEN days what.......what if the kids go "mummy mummy, one week only have 7 days right? why they put 8 days??" OR "teacher teacher, got monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday, sunday..then got one more day call what ah?"
then again i'm not an avid fan of the mag so naturally i won't know. but just recently, i realised it's quite a dumb but humouring source of entertainment. i must say they really have GOOD and buey-kiasi writers. man...when pens become the weapon of destruction...literally. be glad, my friend...and rejoice to the fact that you are unpopular and a nobody. at least you won't have to explain for your overreactive sweat-glands. LOL. oh, you won't know what i'm talking about if you don't watch tv or don't read 8 days. so get a life, get your 8 days~
..they should so pay me for advertising.
anyways, as usual lah, i was super entertained by the way some writers write about certain celebrities...like they just DISS you know...they don't give a care whether they'll earn themselves a lawsuit or not cus apparently, celebrities are so FILTHY rich [like angelina jolie who bought this US$450 stuffed girafe from this exclusive toy shop called FAO don't know what which i can't even pronounce, for her kids.] like honestly, the giraffe looks like one you can find in a pasa-malam OKAY.
...cool celebrities ALSO won't give hoot about mags like 8days, they'll prolly go "where do they even get the 8th day in a week idea from?" with that what-the-hell face. i'd reckon they'd be more interested pregnating themselves.
aiya, anyways, i just love to read about the ridiculously extravagant lives of some hollywood celebrities. some are ridiculously STEWPID and WHATEVER. umm, not some...ALOT. yeah, but i like to read. you may think i'm a Kpo, but i think i'm "helping the sales of mags". you call me a "voyuer", i call myself "a very concerned reader". LOL. gimme a break man!@! there's 8 DAYS EVERY WEEK y'know... i can't be ONLY reading the straits times right??????? LOL!!
okay, so you really are UNINTERESTED in all that gossipy stuff.
congratulations. =)
well i think you're just in denial cus i always say that too to make myself seem more sophisticated. hahahha....then the next thing, i'd be caught reading a celebrity gossip. HAHA. "wah.....mat, thought you don't like these stuff one?!?!?" lalalalalalaa.....it's like being caught for peeing in the pool. LOL.
so, let's not be so quick to deny...let's all be HONEST.
the point is...i'm getting to my point now....the last page of the mag is damn hilarious....they come up with really random stuff. sometimes they are so random they make me feel like an alien for laughing.
This week's about 3 letter SG-style horror flicks and their taglines which have the potential to outsell hollywood ones like "SAW".
Eg1 : TAX - "On April 15, it's time to pay..." [this is embarrassingly lame, i'm sorry]
Eg2: LAN - "just what is turning our teenage boys into mindless zombies?" [their equally mindless parents who allow them on the roads!]
Eg3: CPF - "there's nothing inside...or is there?" [they will put it in when the time comes. for now, you'll just have to wait]
Eg4: ERP - "it's here.... to drive you mad." [then don't drive lah!]
Eg5: SAF - "on Tekong, no one can hear you scream...." [no your platoon mates will, just that they pretend not to]
Eg6: PCK the Horror Movie "The mole..................it's ALIVE!" [.....no comments...]
then again i'm not an avid fan of the mag so naturally i won't know. but just recently, i realised it's quite a dumb but humouring source of entertainment. i must say they really have GOOD and buey-kiasi writers. man...when pens become the weapon of destruction...literally. be glad, my friend...and rejoice to the fact that you are unpopular and a nobody. at least you won't have to explain for your overreactive sweat-glands. LOL. oh, you won't know what i'm talking about if you don't watch tv or don't read 8 days. so get a life, get your 8 days~
..they should so pay me for advertising.
anyways, as usual lah, i was super entertained by the way some writers write about certain celebrities...like they just DISS you know...they don't give a care whether they'll earn themselves a lawsuit or not cus apparently, celebrities are so FILTHY rich [like angelina jolie who bought this US$450 stuffed girafe from this exclusive toy shop called FAO don't know what which i can't even pronounce, for her kids.] like honestly, the giraffe looks like one you can find in a pasa-malam OKAY.
...cool celebrities ALSO won't give hoot about mags like 8days, they'll prolly go "where do they even get the 8th day in a week idea from?" with that what-the-hell face. i'd reckon they'd be more interested pregnating themselves.
aiya, anyways, i just love to read about the ridiculously extravagant lives of some hollywood celebrities. some are ridiculously STEWPID and WHATEVER. umm, not some...ALOT. yeah, but i like to read. you may think i'm a Kpo, but i think i'm "helping the sales of mags". you call me a "voyuer", i call myself "a very concerned reader". LOL. gimme a break man!@! there's 8 DAYS EVERY WEEK y'know... i can't be ONLY reading the straits times right??????? LOL!!
okay, so you really are UNINTERESTED in all that gossipy stuff.
congratulations. =)
well i think you're just in denial cus i always say that too to make myself seem more sophisticated. hahahha....then the next thing, i'd be caught reading a celebrity gossip. HAHA. "wah.....mat, thought you don't like these stuff one?!?!?" lalalalalalaa.....it's like being caught for peeing in the pool. LOL.
so, let's not be so quick to deny...let's all be HONEST.
the point is...i'm getting to my point now....the last page of the mag is damn hilarious....they come up with really random stuff. sometimes they are so random they make me feel like an alien for laughing.
This week's about 3 letter SG-style horror flicks and their taglines which have the potential to outsell hollywood ones like "SAW".
Eg1 : TAX - "On April 15, it's time to pay..." [this is embarrassingly lame, i'm sorry]
Eg2: LAN - "just what is turning our teenage boys into mindless zombies?" [their equally mindless parents who allow them on the roads!]
Eg3: CPF - "there's nothing inside...or is there?" [they will put it in when the time comes. for now, you'll just have to wait]
Eg4: ERP - "it's here.... to drive you mad." [then don't drive lah!]
Eg5: SAF - "on Tekong, no one can hear you scream...." [no your platoon mates will, just that they pretend not to]
Eg6: PCK the Horror Movie "The mole..................it's ALIVE!" [.....no comments...]
OMG."'
Sunday, November 11, 2007
SG is so small i tell you. i'm so darn sick of the very few and miserable shopping malls we have here. bleah...... and my legs are so tired from walking and walking and walking ................................... PLUS, i think 3 consecutive days in orchard is REALLY, REALLY getting to me..it's not even about the company ANYMORE.
can u sense how PISSY i am now? not yet....then i can do better. WHY?? you don't wana know, but it's so easy to guess.. HA HA.
and MY oh MY. it's a crime to be in orchard on sunday. everywhere you turn, you see....... [cannot say lah, sg so uptight]. lol. our country is pretty much infested with [i'm sorry, i really cannot say...i'm like how peace-loving], anyways, i trust that you can infer.
i hate this man. my two favourite girls already finished their exams yet i'm still stuck in this pit-hole. DAMMIT! i can imagine my following weeks will be a lot less exciting....not like it has ever been. WAHAHAHAA....
OH i so wana blog about this sickenning thing jiayi and i did yesterday night. LOL. we were like friendster-stalking our secondary school seniors lah! woah it's like HOW FUN CAN. i'm sorry to say but everyone does childish lame stuff once in a while right, just that "honest" [no doubt minority] people like us shamelessly talk about it. hahahaha....
we were like damn stalker lah! we went searching for profiles of all the notorious, cute, smart-like hell, cool-like-don't-know-what, gorgeous like there's no tomorrow seniors we admired in our sec-school days. and also some other not so flattering looking ones lah...man, they must have evolved...just like US! lol.
can you imagine we spent like an hour plus just looking through their pictures and stuff...and it was already like 2 am and jiayi still refuse to go take her shower. we're really DIE HARD stalkers can. wahahahaa....but the more we look at how they've been, the more we compare ourselves to them.
the verdict: they're so high-lifers now lor. they take photos at parties we take in SBS buses. they club, we watch youtube..blah blah blah...
aiyah...WHO CARES man! okay maybe i do, a little.....but i must live up to my principles! lol.... my patch of grass is green enough...haha.
***Besty! take care yah! and let's go watch the BEE MOVIE!!!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA.......
p.s.: my fellow k-sters, date me please! i need kara-therapy!!!
can u sense how PISSY i am now? not yet....then i can do better. WHY?? you don't wana know, but it's so easy to guess.. HA HA.
and MY oh MY. it's a crime to be in orchard on sunday. everywhere you turn, you see....... [cannot say lah, sg so uptight]. lol. our country is pretty much infested with [i'm sorry, i really cannot say...i'm like how peace-loving], anyways, i trust that you can infer.
i hate this man. my two favourite girls already finished their exams yet i'm still stuck in this pit-hole. DAMMIT! i can imagine my following weeks will be a lot less exciting....not like it has ever been. WAHAHAHAA....
OH i so wana blog about this sickenning thing jiayi and i did yesterday night. LOL. we were like friendster-stalking our secondary school seniors lah! woah it's like HOW FUN CAN. i'm sorry to say but everyone does childish lame stuff once in a while right, just that "honest" [no doubt minority] people like us shamelessly talk about it. hahahaha....
we were like damn stalker lah! we went searching for profiles of all the notorious, cute, smart-like hell, cool-like-don't-know-what, gorgeous like there's no tomorrow seniors we admired in our sec-school days. and also some other not so flattering looking ones lah...man, they must have evolved...just like US! lol.
can you imagine we spent like an hour plus just looking through their pictures and stuff...and it was already like 2 am and jiayi still refuse to go take her shower. we're really DIE HARD stalkers can. wahahahaa....but the more we look at how they've been, the more we compare ourselves to them.
the verdict: they're so high-lifers now lor. they take photos at parties we take in SBS buses. they club, we watch youtube..blah blah blah...
aiyah...WHO CARES man! okay maybe i do, a little.....but i must live up to my principles! lol.... my patch of grass is green enough...haha.
***Besty! take care yah! and let's go watch the BEE MOVIE!!!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA.......
p.s.: my fellow k-sters, date me please! i need kara-therapy!!!
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
i hate rejections, i really do.
tell me about it man, i'm like the Queen of rejections [on the receiving end that is].
despite being rejected by this particular guy like what, a dozen times? i still can't bring myself to hate him. like how dumb can i get? the first time i thought i'm gonna die, the 2nd time, my whole world's gonna crumble....the 3rd, maybe i should really DIE. lol....
..now, i'm resolved to think that i'm better off without him. i honestly did used to think that if there's anyone i'm gonna be with, it HAS to be him. and it took a really long time before i finally take him outta the picture.
then again, he's not exactly out of the picture. he never fails to serve as a reminder of how dumb i am.
until now, i still think part of me can't get over him. but i am moving on. at least i try to....[i HAVE TO after 7 years right?!] if i cry, he'll never come back. if he did see me cry, he will also never come back. so it's only logical if i deal with it myself right?
i know it's torturous to meet someone you like almost everyday, but what about spending a whole week in a camp with your ex in your group? you get to see him the first thing you wake up morning, you play games together, you even get to hold his hands....yet he also makes you cry. how the hell do you think that felt? somehow, you know he hates you, but you still love him..isn't that worse?
i could've so leapt off the rock wall and DIE. the most biting pain of all would be how he's so polite to you...man, the cruelty of his politeness is indescribable.
i know different people go through different types of rejection. but at the end of the day, you sit yourself down and measure the things you've lost and gained in the process....it may look like this;
-i lost a potential love, but i gained myself a good friend and i get to hang around him all the time, he won't hate me, we can still go for classes together, he won't ignore me on msn....etc etc.
and if you think about it, the loss u suffered is not even really a loss.
...yeah if only love is all that logical...BUT, when all else fails, you gotta come back down to earth and deal with it the best logical way.
i took my time to learn, maybe you all should too.
my advice: love yourself a little more cus it's not all about him, it's about you =)
tell me about it man, i'm like the Queen of rejections [on the receiving end that is].
despite being rejected by this particular guy like what, a dozen times? i still can't bring myself to hate him. like how dumb can i get? the first time i thought i'm gonna die, the 2nd time, my whole world's gonna crumble....the 3rd, maybe i should really DIE. lol....
..now, i'm resolved to think that i'm better off without him. i honestly did used to think that if there's anyone i'm gonna be with, it HAS to be him. and it took a really long time before i finally take him outta the picture.
then again, he's not exactly out of the picture. he never fails to serve as a reminder of how dumb i am.
until now, i still think part of me can't get over him. but i am moving on. at least i try to....[i HAVE TO after 7 years right?!] if i cry, he'll never come back. if he did see me cry, he will also never come back. so it's only logical if i deal with it myself right?
i know it's torturous to meet someone you like almost everyday, but what about spending a whole week in a camp with your ex in your group? you get to see him the first thing you wake up morning, you play games together, you even get to hold his hands....yet he also makes you cry. how the hell do you think that felt? somehow, you know he hates you, but you still love him..isn't that worse?
i could've so leapt off the rock wall and DIE. the most biting pain of all would be how he's so polite to you...man, the cruelty of his politeness is indescribable.
i know different people go through different types of rejection. but at the end of the day, you sit yourself down and measure the things you've lost and gained in the process....it may look like this;
-i lost a potential love, but i gained myself a good friend and i get to hang around him all the time, he won't hate me, we can still go for classes together, he won't ignore me on msn....etc etc.
and if you think about it, the loss u suffered is not even really a loss.
...yeah if only love is all that logical...BUT, when all else fails, you gotta come back down to earth and deal with it the best logical way.
i took my time to learn, maybe you all should too.
my advice: love yourself a little more cus it's not all about him, it's about you =)
Monday, November 05, 2007
let's talk about FAIRNESS
When was the last time you wonder to yourself why your life is so unfair?
think for me, it was 2 weeks ago when i saw this average looking vietnam woman pay for an LV bag with a stack of hundred dollar bills [and a SHINY piece of Platinum card in her wallet]. THIS, in all SHALLOWNESS spells U.N.F.A.I.R to me at that moment.
but immediately after that sinful thought, i felt guilty. Not cus i of the consolation for having a titanium card in my wallet, but i know it is just WRONG.
sometimes i do lament about how boring or hectic my life is, and my occasional suayness when my luck hits rock-bottom....but at least i'm eating well, living well, and don't have to worry about my tomorrows.
if i were to say life's a bitch, then i might as well call myself one... a lot of times, it's the way you see things. many people tell me i look damn carefree, the truth is, i have my problems too....and if you really now me well enough, i don't cope well. and sometimes, i choose to indulge in that sickening cycle of whining-moodswings-whining...it never ends..and what i realise is that it not only takes a toll on me, it also affects the people i care about.
what i'm trying to say is, life has never been fair; but it gives you choices.
i can choose to marry a rich man and be like that vietnam woman; i can also choose to work my arse off the conventional way to be rich enough to own my own platinum card. similarly, i can also choose to deal with my problems in a positive way; or i can let my emotions get the better of me and annoy everyone around me.
i know it's easier said than done. but if you can compare yourself with people you deem better off than you are, then you should also do so for those unfortunate ones you subconsciously refuse to acknowledge.
the grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side; her life is always better than mine; her shoes are so pretty; why can't my boyfriend be like that?
now i think about it, i don't have to fight with my own pride and sell curry puffs along the corridoors of a HDB block and run to hide when my classmates see me. i don't have to literally fight with kids who laugh at how poor i am. and i definitely won't have to get first in class just so i could have a slice of chocolate cake as a reward because i've NEVER tasted cake in my entire life.
..all these he did, but my dad never really contested whether or not his life is fair. he always tells me i'm lucky, but back then i was too young to realise. Now, when i look at him, he always reminds me of how bloody fair my life is.
SO, Life's actually very fair because it offers choices, so you just have to make the right ones. like, how unfair can your life be when you get to dl free songs online?!
think for me, it was 2 weeks ago when i saw this average looking vietnam woman pay for an LV bag with a stack of hundred dollar bills [and a SHINY piece of Platinum card in her wallet]. THIS, in all SHALLOWNESS spells U.N.F.A.I.R to me at that moment.
but immediately after that sinful thought, i felt guilty. Not cus i of the consolation for having a titanium card in my wallet, but i know it is just WRONG.
sometimes i do lament about how boring or hectic my life is, and my occasional suayness when my luck hits rock-bottom....but at least i'm eating well, living well, and don't have to worry about my tomorrows.
if i were to say life's a bitch, then i might as well call myself one... a lot of times, it's the way you see things. many people tell me i look damn carefree, the truth is, i have my problems too....and if you really now me well enough, i don't cope well. and sometimes, i choose to indulge in that sickening cycle of whining-moodswings-whining...it never ends..and what i realise is that it not only takes a toll on me, it also affects the people i care about.
what i'm trying to say is, life has never been fair; but it gives you choices.
i can choose to marry a rich man and be like that vietnam woman; i can also choose to work my arse off the conventional way to be rich enough to own my own platinum card. similarly, i can also choose to deal with my problems in a positive way; or i can let my emotions get the better of me and annoy everyone around me.
i know it's easier said than done. but if you can compare yourself with people you deem better off than you are, then you should also do so for those unfortunate ones you subconsciously refuse to acknowledge.
the grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side; her life is always better than mine; her shoes are so pretty; why can't my boyfriend be like that?
now i think about it, i don't have to fight with my own pride and sell curry puffs along the corridoors of a HDB block and run to hide when my classmates see me. i don't have to literally fight with kids who laugh at how poor i am. and i definitely won't have to get first in class just so i could have a slice of chocolate cake as a reward because i've NEVER tasted cake in my entire life.
..all these he did, but my dad never really contested whether or not his life is fair. he always tells me i'm lucky, but back then i was too young to realise. Now, when i look at him, he always reminds me of how bloody fair my life is.
SO, Life's actually very fair because it offers choices, so you just have to make the right ones. like, how unfair can your life be when you get to dl free songs online?!
FEFE the loser
you know my sister has lotsa issues...one of which is with showing care and concern for the people around her. she has huge issues with even kind gestures [I'M NOT KIDDING]. if you ever seen her before you'll get what i mean...lol.
k anyways, here goes....
FeFe: jiejie, did i tell u did i tell u??? the other day hor, i did a damn embarassing thing leh. OMG! if i tell you you sure laugh at me one. it is SO EMBARASSING LOR. i thought for once in my life i did a good deed leh...
Me: what? say lah! [and i typed away w/o looking at her]
Fefe: you know i was queueing at the 851 queue at the interchange, then i saw this blind man waiting to board the bus...then there's this Malay guy in front of me and i was thinking he sure won't help him up the bus one lor...
Me: uh huh....then?
Fefe: then since i'm 2nd in the queue then i must help him right? so when the bus came i went to help him lah....
Me: wah you SURE not?! u go help him ah??
Fefe: YARR~! and then i was like "scuse me u need my help?" hahahahhaaa...then the blind man say "oh thank u thank u" ahahahhahaa.....the he said "OH!" suddenly...wahahahahahaa...
Me: MY GOD, don't tell me he knock his head on the door?!
Fefe: WAHAHAHHAHAHhhaaa...[and she only composed herself after 30 seconds] noo...ahaha....he knocked on the bus' side mirror! i feel SO SORRY for him man....then i quickly said "sorry x 10" then he said "nevermind nevermind".
Me: [laughing uncontrollably] wah u're damn LOSER man, fefe!!!!
Fefe: [rolling around her bed laughing madly]
Me: woah Fe i pity the blind man leh...poorthing....you wana help him in the end you HAI him. wahahahhahaaa~~
hilarious. when she finally have the conscience to do nice things...LOL. she screws up...
FEFE, practice makes PERFECT. you should start with Obeying me.
wahahahahahaa....that's a nice gesture F.Y.I.
k anyways, here goes....
FeFe: jiejie, did i tell u did i tell u??? the other day hor, i did a damn embarassing thing leh. OMG! if i tell you you sure laugh at me one. it is SO EMBARASSING LOR. i thought for once in my life i did a good deed leh...
Me: what? say lah! [and i typed away w/o looking at her]
Fefe: you know i was queueing at the 851 queue at the interchange, then i saw this blind man waiting to board the bus...then there's this Malay guy in front of me and i was thinking he sure won't help him up the bus one lor...
Me: uh huh....then?
Fefe: then since i'm 2nd in the queue then i must help him right? so when the bus came i went to help him lah....
Me: wah you SURE not?! u go help him ah??
Fefe: YARR~! and then i was like "scuse me u need my help?" hahahahhaaa...then the blind man say "oh thank u thank u" ahahahhahaa.....the he said "OH!" suddenly...wahahahahahaa...
Me: MY GOD, don't tell me he knock his head on the door?!
Fefe: WAHAHAHHAHAHhhaaa...[and she only composed herself after 30 seconds] noo...ahaha....he knocked on the bus' side mirror! i feel SO SORRY for him man....then i quickly said "sorry x 10" then he said "nevermind nevermind".
Me: [laughing uncontrollably] wah u're damn LOSER man, fefe!!!!
Fefe: [rolling around her bed laughing madly]
Me: woah Fe i pity the blind man leh...poorthing....you wana help him in the end you HAI him. wahahahhahaaa~~
hilarious. when she finally have the conscience to do nice things...LOL. she screws up...
FEFE, practice makes PERFECT. you should start with Obeying me.
wahahahahahaa....that's a nice gesture F.Y.I.
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Reasons to smile
yes, i've got lotsa reasons to smile. apart from the fact that i have money in my bank account, there're quite a couple of happy things happening around me now. NO, i've not found my prince charming yet....i don't know why he's taking SOOOOO long either....
Rather, it's great things happenning to the people around me, and of cus lah, MYSELF.
But then again, me finding out about certain things about my friends can be a problem. not that i can't keep secrets....but i just don't know how to feel obliged to keep them. WAHAHAHA...okok kidding, i remember i have an entire post about keeping secrets not long ago....You can go through the dreadful process of reading it again if you're dying of boredom.
lol. SO, my recommendation to all: if you are itching to say something you're not supposed to, say it to your toilet bowl! and then flush!....
....
..
..
.
.
don't you ever watch TV?! come on!! it's much better than shouting underneath a flying aeroplane.....so CLICHE! WAHAHAHAHAHA
okok....so what good things actually happened. well, there's one that i cannot say. if i do, then you'll never see another blog entry from me EVER AGAIN [OMG, did u just secretly wished for that!?!?]. lol. i'm dead serious, and so is SHE. WAHAHAHHAA.... but JM, i'm really really honestly [from the bottom of my kind heart] happy for you. =) it's like i can feel your happiness and excitement...if you need me i'll ALWAYS be there for you, [on monday, tuesday, thursday and friday] in school....WAHAHAHAHA~~ kidding lah, you know what i mean.
THEN, i convinced a really RELUCTANT new adopted jm of mine to dye his hair! and he actually looks good with the new hair....he must be so inspired by U-know's drop dead gorgeous hairdo. lol.
SHIT, it's like i wana blog somemore but i can't remember what else i wana blog about....problem....... these days, i've been much more of an essay-churning machine, which means i can hardly write about anything else besides essays and podcasts and newsletters and releases. AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH~~
so friends, please gimme more reasons to smile.
call me. tell me a joke. treat me to lunch. sing me a tvxq song....whatever.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)