Breaking-up

Breaking up is like so common these days it's even comparable to putting on weight.

Like why is everyone breaking up? The whole damn world is breaking up. i just realised, a lot of people around me have broken up while some are at the verge. Don't be over-sensitive my friend, i'm not taking joy in stealing inspiration from your misery, i'm merely amazed by how fragile a relationship can be.

But who am i to judge or comment on such a private, sensitive issue, right? well i don't exactly have to be 'in-your-shoes' to know what you're going through, and neither do i wana come close to that. Just that to a certain extent, i feel the meaning of "building a relationship" is skewed.

Of cus i know being together is all about being happy and at ease with one another and there has to be the almighty "LOVE" involved. but these are mandatory. what about the other things in a relationship you don't or refuse to see?

At first it's all about spending time together..the intimacy..status change... then a few months passes-by... maybe a year or two... then what happens? the future that seemed oh-s0-grim becomes apparent to you inch by inch. what happens next may be something neither you nor your partner want to explore.

All these time arguments start to surface inevitably, each other's flaws become way too glaring to the extent of the slightest annoyance. but these are all natural. taking turns to give-in works, but how long exactly can this last? What's most tiring is when the same person gives in all the time and it becomes a habit.

SO, here's my two-cent's worth coined "conditions of love":
*i will substitute him/her with "ai ren". LOL.

- If you think you can tolerate and embrace your ai ren's bad habits
- If you think your love for your ai ren far outweighs your ai ren's social status
- If you can BARE YOUR heart to your ai ren
- If you are willing to talk and listen and make your ai ren do the same
- If you the 'future' in question between the two of you heads to the same direction
- If you are not afraid to think of a 'future' with your ai ren in the picture
- If you are very sure your ai ren can become your 'habit'

..that's about all.

i know most guys are quite turned off by the burden of a future. Like "what the hell? we just got together!" and all you might care about is what IS now. but before you think it's very modern of you to think so, just think a bit more about your other half. what are you doing wasting his or her time? if you can't solve existing problems together now, what makes you think that you can in the future? no matter how much you wana dodge it you'll still have to face it right?

unless the both of you are saddists... i don't think this is what you're looking for.

i think a lot of people are undermining the meaning of being in a relationship. why don't they take some time to think about what it is that they're looking for, or who they themselves really are.

before you jump on the bandwagon like everyone else does, you should really think about who you are and what you need, not who you want. Of cus sometimes it's easier to hop-on and test it out, but truthfully, whatever makes you happy may mean misery to others. like what if the guy truly loves you while you're just taking a ride? is it fair?

don't go breaking hearts man.... we're not kids anymore. even if it takes forever to find a matching one, well, if that's what it takes.....so be it.

I realised something, for those who are mending their broken hearts, i think it's quite saddistic of me but listening to those really saddening love songs works wonders. LOL. like you should just force out every inch of your sadness and pour out the very depths of your sorrows once and for all. get what i mean? but if you feel worse don't come find me okay. =X

Anyways, One truth that jiayi and i swore by is that time will not change a person's life, only a change attitude will. it is the SAME when it comes to relationships. So you better make your heart die faster when your partner's heart change if not you might just die from the heartbreak. so if you're a guy, deal with it like a real man...though i know that a guy's heart can be far more fragile then a woman's. The thing is, Men are stronger on the outside; women are stronger on the inside.

In any case, i believe i'm getting out of point... haha. anyways, it really doesn't matter if two persons are vastly different, just so long as the things that they're looking for in a relationship is the same, all else is secondary.