Episode: i don't need a boyfriend...

....or do i?

honestly, i don't really care. but i hope i'll have one after 21.. it's only natural right? it scares me cus even one of the most unlikely friend i know is at the verge of being attached... *i'm happy for you, fret not.*

i shall not lead myself into some mindless reminisence on who i adored most from then till now...or who i haven't let go...it's a phase, i know. but because i'm older [seemingly], i've learnt to keep things in my heart. an occasional recollection with the right kinda song does it... and tomorrow, i'll wake up on my own again.

so it's not hard to guess what valentine's day means to me. in fact, i've never spent one with a guy before...lol. i wonder why... maybe i'm just unconciously trying to save it for someone special next time, or whatever. maybe i just don't have the luck and all...

for one, i'm really quite a quirky person. i sort of can't imagine anyone who'll like a girl like me. that's not to say i'm helplessly horrible or something. but sometimes i really wonder... cus i'm uninteresting [well i can be if i try hard enough...], i've kinda lost interest in pleasing people or even attempt to put the best of me before a guy. in other words, i'm just disinterested. i'm not enthusiastic in making male friends, perhaps. it's quite tiring to make someone understand you or even like you...it's a super long and dreadful process. plus, i don't look fantastic. so i probably don't fit into the category for consideration of shallow-metrosexual guys either. watching too much tv doesn't help...it pretty much makes things worst.

it's the same old stupid story...the guy you like doesn't like you/the guy you like has a girlfriend/the guy you like has a trashy girlfriend yet he still sticks to her/the guy you like hates you/the guy you like doesn't even know you exist. and sadly, the guy you like always hangsout with pretty and confident girls. NOW YOU KNOW WHY I'M DISINTERESTED?!

No chance, no luck, no hope.

so my beloved friends/sisters....if you don't have a boyfriend this V-day and you feel cold and lonesome, if you think the sight of lovey-dovey couples irks you, or even the smell of roses irritable...i'm just an sms away. [don't call me cus my incoming calls not free].

wait...i do have a plan B!

i can spend it with muffy.

Grosteque scale for Valentine's Day: ***** [ it's self-explanatory]

Episode: like an Angel- Xu Wei Lun

She was like a reincarnated angel....but now, i hope she'll really be flying amongst them.

life's cruel on some and you really don't know what awaits you tomorrow.

Live happy, Live pretty, Live life to the fullest.

...until you reach the another world, don't waste it.

Episode: "Gross Dao" Fahrenheit autograph session.

Once is enough and i'll never succumb myself to such grostique circumstances ANYMORE!

lol. i almost LAUGHED OUT LOUD at myself in the damn queue. but what an experience. SO DESU NE.....this is what it's like to go gaga over idols....lol....funny funny.... you will laugh with me if you see the lunatic teens running after the van....

All you get is 0.3 secs with them after queueing for 4 hrs.....silly me. and how frustrating, i didn't get an autograph after all.....

regret...why did i betray david Tao for him...?

...the pic explains it all....[go pee also look so cute]. Damn....

at least we had fun.

Grostique Scale: **** [4 stars...in case u think it's somekind of vulgarity]5 is the max.

wishing and hoping...

i'm gonna meet my idol on Sunday and i can hardly contain my excitement...you probably won't get it, but when u know who i'm meeting you might...lol. it's a secret. i'll tell when i get the pics and stuff...

it's quite embarrassing to be only doing crazy stuff like chasing idols now, but i really wana do something mad/childish/exciting before i hit 21...haha....it doesn't matter what people say or think about this man, i'm doing stuff for myself. anyways, how many lives can i live right? i don't care if i'll have to dig a hole and hide my face when i recall this incident 10 yrs from now...

actually, idols are like every other human beings.... they can even be like the pretty boy you occassionally bump into in school....so far-fetched and out of reach cus you know you'll never be on the same level...you're from 2 different worlds...even being in the same tutorial class seems to be the most exclusive thing in the world to you...haha. can you even imagine breathing in the same air and being in the same place at the same time? how many times do you brag about it to your girlfriends? we somehow forget that they're nothing fantastic, really. they eat the same kinda food, sleep on beds and they don't have antenas sticking from their heads. they are so not out of this world if we ever think sanely.

BUT STILL, i can't help myself from ogling at them....just plain, harmeless ogling. and sometimes fantasize about how nice it would be if we're friends or even together...haha. same goes for the idols....their only speciality will be their killer-good-looks, a tinch of acting skills or maybe hitting a couple of right tunes. that's sufficient to send girls flooding their fansites. yet i'm so guilty of loving them secretly too... but not all. come to think of it, it's funny how shallow people can be unknowingly. no matter how much you hate this shallowness....you can't escape from being part of it. just how many times do you turn your head for a 2nd look at an ugly guy? no right.... or how many times have you resisted pointing out a cute guy to you friend? i bet never....see...shallowness is IN YOU...it's like an innate characteristic you can't shed. scary?

but how i hate those guys who go for looks...............

ironic?

too bad, cus i'm a not-so-pretty girl...lol.

i LOVE MUMMY!!!!

yup, i simply adore my mom!

she does housework everyday, cooks nice food for us and makes sure there's soup on the table every night....she wakes us up in the morning and of cus...how can i ever forget the shopping!!! lol...

that's not all can...she always treats us to sumptuous meals at restaurants on weekends!!! MUMMY I LOVE YOU!!!! haha.[why are u in India, dad?]

"we want a bit of EVERYTHING!"

see what happens when she's asked to take a photo?

this is how you smile, fefe....

look at the XIAOLONG BAO!

Absolutely irresistable!!!

BBUuurrRRRP!!!

feel like i could float

okay, i'm weak lah, happy?

was supposed to be a string of 'non-stop hits' [as what Cher Lau calls it] for me today....10-12, 12-2, 2-4. please tell me i'm a genius at planning.

BUT

lucky me [irony-intended] i'm down with flu again....and as usual lah, the i-can't-breathe-thru-my-nose drama....bleah......and my throat was itching so bad i can't speak properly.... i was supposed to do a presentation today....so blame it on the weather.

save all the trouble lah, an MC would be the WISEST choice. do you know? i'll probably top the list of "Friends of medipoint clinic" should there be any of this sort. all i need to do is walk in and say hi to the recep-aunty and wait. the GP is my friend man....that explains the spoil-market rates she charges me...lol.

btw, i'm finally, officially active in a CCA now...i'm a marketing exec in our fac's Arts Club...the deputy of the marketing director.... do i hear a "WAAAAHHH!!!"? no. cus whatever that means, think it's something like a secretary....all i do is 'follow-ups' with sponsors...and i tell u, some are REAl big-shot sponsors...of cus there're others like the milo-van... awww c'mon, we ALL love the milo-van don't we? lol. getting sponsors is a tough job okay...anyway, i'm gonna start calling SDU...lol my director says they'll basically support any activities involving males n females... that's ridiculously funny to me. but heck....since this is gonna earn me a nice cert and an upper-hand in my job-resume when i graduate...i'm more than happy.

for now....i'll just float away. [credits to the dose of cough drops]

I'M SAD.....

Know why? cus my secondary school f&n teacher passed away...

remember Ms Chang?

the unforgettable "sit with the pipes"...

the ridiculously dry sinks...

the pinches...

the laughter...

the joy...

the love...

...and the guidance

it's sad we never kept our promise of visiting her after graduation.

it's just damn sad...

life is short man.

70 and still a pervert!

he's so old and so obviously fragile yet he climbed up and sat on the metal railings in the bus queue just so he could stare at some sexy girl's boobs.

and he didn't even attempt to conceal his motives...indespicable!

he simply STARED right at her chest waiting for her loose top to give way and reveal some boob flesh....disgusting!

puke puke puke... and the girl ain't that pretty even.....

and i was soooo right cus he sat right behind her when he boarded the bus. needless to say, that was to gawk at her bums under that pair of ultra tiny shorts when she alights.

some old men are really PERVERTS!!!

it's me and my lil school bag and an empty stomach.

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL.... yay.

do i sound excited? not quite but i'm happy i finally have a proper schedule of things to do. i kinda like my plans this sem:
1) General Biology
2) Genes and Society
3) SouthEast Asian Studies
4) Social Psychology of New Media [major]
5) Theories of New Media [major]

i don't exactly know what genes n society is about but who cares if it only costs me 1 bidding point. haaaa....

though i'm not an avid new-yr-resolution follower, it just occured to me that i can't bump around like i did last sem...i MUST at least set some targets to uh-hm, feel motivated. and it's not like i write stuff like "i wana be a university scholar" or anything close.... just some down to earth and feasible goals...haha. and not to forget my long-awaited holidays and some other crap.

i was telling yy i feel totally 'Sciencified' this sem cus of the bio modules i chose...oh well....i can only say, they have nice LTs..

just an observation, the faculty is pleasant but their toilets are awfully hard to find. what, people there don't pee? lol. maybe we're just new. but the fish tanks in some bio-labs really don't smell too good. haha..

today, my genes n soc lect lasted for only 1.45hrs... like most of the lectures did. and i stayed in school for just about tt length of time too.

that's the best part of my first day, perhaps.

oh i'm so into household chores these days....i wake up at 9 every morning and slip that pair of pink gloves on [like what Dexter's mother wore everyday just that her's r yellow...omg, pls don't tell me you don't know who's Dexter. Kaoz....how can anyone NOT know Dexter?!] i'm beginning to experience my utility at home. maybe i should consider sending my maid a 'thank you' card.

"Have Yourself, a Merry little Christmas...."

It's probably snowing away at the other half of the hemisphere yet here we're constantly inconvenienced by torrential rain. what a dread to leave home when you know it's safe and sound at home.

Tell me about the number of times you're about to leave your flat and the rain just starts pouring away at your door step. your pretty pair of shoes are drenched like the way your mood is the moment the sky darkens...

And as if you'll feel much consolation, Christmas is on its way! i'd like to think that since it's a season of giving, then God must have wanted to bless S'pore with more water. i can't think of a better explanation than this.

Or can the incessant rain be the tropical version of a snowy christmas???
Instead of a WHITE christmas, we're having a WET one. nowonder people get kinda depressed during this period. like cracking our heads for gift ideas are not enough, we have to put up with bad weather...this also means we have one hand less to carry the shopping bags cus you'll probably have to use one to hold an umbrella.

I hate crowds. that explains why i was drinking coffee at starbucks, people-watching with glynis on christmas eve. we couldn't think of a more innovative way to celebrate christmas, and there was nothing quite merry about it. the countdown was kinda random cus who knows which clock to follow? and off went the poppers...i don't do poppers btw...it's the next closest thing to a bomb, followed by balloons. if there's a device to measure my excitement level seconds before and after the countdown, it should read "anti-climax". at best, we settled with a movie marathon. it could've been on any ordinary day but that's the best alternative to avoid the smelly crowd yet not bore ourselves at home.


Orchard Road in the morning was disgusting. On christmas day, that is. the smell of party ribbons and sticky foam on the ground was unbearable. the aftermath is really not a tourist-friendly sight, considering our clean history. the eves of special occassions is like a ticket to destroy. i can't help but wonder if s'poreans are really that oppressed on the other 363 days in the island. it's a real pity for the cleaning personnels. they must be cursing away at those people.

the only thing that was so chrismassy about this christmas was that christmas songs are ringing continuosly in my head, except for the time i fell asleep on the first train back.

"Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...Jackfrost snipping at your nose..."

MX!

@ Balcony Bar

am i tired or am i just bad at drinking? well, take me drinking someday to find out k? i'm curious too...cus i really don't think 2 glasses of vodka lime can knock me out...haha. i wasn't knocked out lah, if i am then i won't be blogging now.

Anyways, was at Balcony Bar for my volleyball senior's 21st birthday.
it kinda set me thinking how i should plan mine next year... chalet's a bit cliche but it's the most convenient....blah blah blah.... maybe it's still early to be brooding over such stuff.

Balcony Bar is at the Heeren's [f.y.i]. it costs like $2000+ for 20 to 30+ guests....what a bomb! but my lucky senior's got a rich and doting dad...
if i were to hold my birthday there i'll not invite those "SaiKang" friends for sure. don't waste my money man...but if they don't drink also a bit wasted cus it's all in the package.

Totally in our own world...haha!
...Glyn and me

***just recieved a msg from jiayi lim. it reads "i miss you. Good Night!"
realised how i've been "neglecting" her for tv....i'm such a lousy friend.

boo. i better sleep now. i can actually feel the vessels breaking out in my eyeballs....

Ai[4] Mei[3] Bu[4] Yao[4] Ming[4]

Heels are so Lovely.

They make me taller, make my legs seem longer and my esteem higher.

BUT!

They cause so much pain and discomfort. i had a hard time getting used to.

Still, i'm proud of myself. i donned this dainty pair of heels for half a day.

New Best Friends...

when i was 9, i had 5 best friends...now, i'm still friends with 4 and lost 1 [she's "MIA"].

when i was 14, i had 3 best friends....now, i've had 2 of them in my friendster contacts, and had fallen-out with 1.

when i was 16, i had 2 best friends....they're still with me now but i'm closer to 1.

when i was 18, i had 2 best friends....one of them's attached and we hardly meet, and i always hang out with the other until today.

Now that i'm 20, i have ANOTHER 2 best friends....haha.....

Meet my New Best Friends...

Heehee...my lecture mates, tutorial mates, lunch kakis, gossip providers, laughter generators and my best companions in NUS!!! my lovely Jiemeis!

my point is, everyone of us has different sets of best friends at different point of our lives and sometimes it can be tiring to maintain...especially when we get seperated. But best friends aren't just friends....they don't come and go....they're here to stay. it just takes effort.

sometimes you can't help feeling tired over who's gonna organise the next outing, who's not gonna make it for one, who's always busy with their own lives and boyfriends. you get pissed, you get frustrated mostly because you don't have a boyfriend. you flare and then ignore....and after that feel bad for it. you've known each other like forever yet you still hate their attitudes sometimes. of cus, you know they're like that, you know their character but you can't help getting mad. They say things you don't like to hear, or mean things to your face. you tick it off as they're just jealous. then you start to wonder, why are You all even best friends when you get so irritated with their flaws??

But at the end of the day when we get to meet, we laugh our hearts out, we make each other smile. that's what matters.

haha. maybe that's what friends are for.

Hapenning Holiday! - japanese students, glorious food and some other happening stuff....

Finally managed to put up the Christmas tree!!! we were a lil late this yr but who cares!!! and the presents at the foot of our tree are all real okay!!! just that i already know what are inside...

...this yr's Xmas resolution: EVRYTHING HAS TO BE CHRISMASSY!!! SO, to begin with, i sewed a brand new christmas collar for muffy!!!!! aaaawww..... just look at him.....isn't he adorable........

at the rate he's prancing around in the house everyday, i might as well grant him his christmas wish of being a reindeer!!! lol....and from the look on his face, his probably gratefu......right?

the chrismassy-mood inspired me so much i had to paint my nails according to the theme. but good things don't last man....i cleaned it off already.....the faceshop nail enamels ain't all perfect you know.....

it's a happenning holiday cus i've finally started my driving lessons!!!! yay!!!! driving's so fun!!! it's really a relevent skill, depite the cost-factor..... even if you have a chauffer, even if you like ppl driving you around, even if you don't think you need to learn....it's good to pick it up someday. despite the couple of blunders i've had in my first lesson, it's still fun!

the eve of my dad's flight to India [again], we went to have a sumptuous dinner at the MushroomPot at the Inoddor Stadium! wah... the food was indescribable man!!! a whole lot of mushroom cuisines to your likings!! lol. i never know mushrooms tasted soooo good! and the mushroom brewed steamboat.................speechless................... and i drank a tiny cup of sakae!
ummm.....it tasted like nail polish remover...the scent of it kinda burns ur nostrils....lol...... and you should finish it warm....i think it'll taste nicer with sushi though...

Finally....i just completed my first hosting job! at first when i recieved the preparations list i thought it's gonna be damn sian and troublesome. but lucky me!!!! it was super fun and engaging!!! the students were easy to get along with and we had lotsa fun!!! all of them even gave the hosts gifts from Japan! so nice!!! though we had some problems with communication, it doesn't stop us from oggling over the characters in Hana Yori Dango!! hee.. the worst part was the walking....and i was super tired and even fell aslp in the train back home. i think i drooled a bit too....whahaahaa.

...and did i tell you the guys in yy's group were soooooo cute??? kawaiii!!! s'porean guys r a bit um.......you know, compared to them? lol. they don't even look like they're 16 or 17 can?! hai~~ wasted.... but luckily our 2 grps took neoprint 2gether!!!! happy happy!!!

oh!!! and i went for Keith's poolside buffet the other day... he didn't change a lot i suppose...still as decent looking as ever... and nicholas teo n gang still as crappy as ever....some things just never change...conclusion drawn: NS guys r pretty much deprived...or maybe it's just them. just realised mi lu bing is keith's churchmates... and i saw their gfs...haha

k lemme think... what other happening stuff?? ooh!!! i bought 2 pairs of shoes and my mummy bought 3!! happenning right??!?!? lol...

and i'm going cycling on wed with my jiemei-men.......yeppy!!!!

TREAT FOR ALL!!!!

These are especially for all you PERVs out there.....

Muffy: "so ur gonna trade green bonies for my bathroom shots? okay, it's a deal!"

"OooOoo....the water's sooooo cold!!!!"

"I'm getting ALLLLL soapy here...."

"I personally don't like this close-up shot...it makes me look retarded"

"Is it Over yet???? damn, i look like a squirrel!"

Old habits die hard. actually, it's not really old.

I know i should be studying......bleah..... so sian....... no entries, no tags..... haaaaa...

why like that?????

just finished my Soci paper at 9 today. this is the first time since my A levels that i'm waking up at 6 in the morning. i was the earliest. every other day after i finished my A's i'm never the one waking up first. i love it. OTOT [own time own target].

Wana have a taste of freedom? Try a dose of OTOT!

i realised....i'm never gonna touch soci again. i hate theories.......all theories are bloody flawed....critics will come up with new ones....and then they're flawed too....then someone heroic will criticise it, and then there's the birth of a new theory...and then the critics continue cricticzing it...and then....and then... and then..... it's a damn vicious-cycle. You know women are vicious, but guess what?? theories w/o functioning brains can be vicious too! luckily i'm not insane enough to exhaust my entire lifetime studying theories.......

One thing i know for sure.....i cannot agree more that Uni- exams are much less demanding than A levels. Study a bit also can pass.....study more even better, can score....consistency plus revision, don't skip tutorials and lectures and [if you're lucky enough to get good project mates] can Ace the module. haha...what a warped and superficial theory.

i coin this MATTY'S ULTRA SUPERFICIAL THEORY for survival in NUS. in short, it's a "MUST"

damn...i see theories flying around...........feminist, conflict, functionalist, control, symbolic interactionist...............

there's a social explanation to everything you do. Dial 1900-so-cio-lo-gy for the answer!

listened, appalled, enlightened...

can i even trust guys now??? hmmm, i really don't know. now i finally realised we can never model our love lives after some popular drama serial....reality's not even close.

You must expect the unexpected if not reality is gonna hit you hard at your face. cus people never seem to be who they are. Behind every pretty face you see, there's always an ugly scar hidden somewhere. beneathe that thick make-up, is an entire face of blemish concealed. and underneathe all the branded and seemingly glamourous clothes, god knows who you'll find.

Seriously, what is normal? Varsity life's all about smoking, clubbing, skipping lectures, making out with your new found friend and sex is it? this is as natural as pouring a glass of water to some. but it's really, really not the norm. does that mean my life will be dull and unhappenning without all that crap? no what.....

i find consolation to the fact that i'm not guilty of any of the above. okay, maybe the skipping lectures part. i don't have to strive to be simple. i am simple. people say i look like i always club but the truth is, i hate it. that's why you can never judge someone from their appearance.

not to say that people who indulge in those activities are evil or sinful.... they have different values in life, so whatever....

maybe cus i watch a lot of tv and dramas...that's why i tend to idealize the way my life should be like according to what i see.... but the more i know these days the more my ideals get crushed. and now all the more i'll put myself on guard. in the first place, i was never really generous in letting guys in.

i should really come back down to earth.

ha.hahaha....

what kind of a ***** calls people a ***** and names him/herself sweet ? seriously......

i almost died laughing reading it. oh well....for once, i thought people i don't know actually reads my blog. YAY. *rolls eyes* too bad i only have one pair of eyes if not i'll keep rolling them till they fall off the sockets.

anyway.... we can't stop people from tagging us cus the tagboard's precisely there for that reason. we also can't help the fact that those people can be assholes who apparently thinks that they're some kind of virtuous blog moderators who goes around calling people a ***** for saying stuff they don't like to hear....using degratory language. how righteous. if you realise, i didn't say the country's bad, or i hate it.....

flood my tagboard with all ur stewpid ***************** for all i care..... i don't really give a shit. but i do hope you find better stuff to do. =)

okay....haha. thanks for giving me inspiration to blog on something worthwhile though, whoever you are..... lol.

To Manga junkies out there....go watch 'Hana Yori Dango' [ japanese version of meteor Garden] on youtube. it's more straight to the point, not draggy and has better looking characters in there. and the best thing is. got english subtitles!!! quite worth watching...only 9 episodes though. each episode has 5 parts and the last one has 7.

Cheers!

WArning

NOW is really not a very good time to irritate me.

NOW will constitute days like TODAY, right this moment you're reading this, and the rest of the week to come.

Biologists coin this PMS. Heck it, to me it's no different from a 'DND' written on my face.

SO,

1) Do not impose yourself upon me and tell me things i don't like to hear.

2) If you have nothing nice to say, DON'T.

3) This is not the time to criticize me or my opinions alike.

4) Pardon me for my bluntness.

This is by no means a childish manifestation of my attitude, but rather my very polite version of an appeal to potential irritants.

Potential irritants can mean even a passing ant. See, the thing is, even ants are not half as irritating as humans. it's ironically those with proper-working brains that are asses.

I'm living on pain killers... the doc says it's Tension Headache. oh okay, i see....but wtf does that mean.

Goodbye Mr pain-in-the-a** tuition kid!
The one thing i've taken away with me [besides the pay] is the realisation that you can never get too comfortable with your student cus they'll eventually climb over your head like a MONKEY. not literally of cus. i'm sorry to say but his mom is paying me PEANUTS and she still wants to bargain. So you're not rich, SO AM I! and i'm not exactly interested in doing charity. even if i am, i wouldn't choose YOUR kid. bleah.

Daddy's flying off to India today...Goodbye, we'll miss him. but why doesn't he wana bring the two cup noodles i bought for him?!?!? ungrateful. very unglam meh? i'd reckon eating curry at an street stall unglam, and ultra unhygenic. C'mon daddy, pack up your ego, AND the cup noodles...i'm only saying this for your own good.

Jolyn's gonna post abstracts of her AS essay in her blog soon. 1st, read the Qn. 2nd, read that paragraph. 3rd, you'll feel your eyebrows twitching. 4th, you'll break into uncontrollable laughter. if you don't find it funny, fret not. this requires some extent of intellectual humour. So, if you don't laugh, it just means you have low EQ.

COld war is B-O-R-I-N-G. if i stayed for the entire lecture, i might DIE. so Jolyn and i left dring break. Pathetic. i have nothing against you and your deliverance, Dr Quek, Cold war simply puts me to sleep.

JUST my personal opinion. i think Xiaxue is really a cool blogger. you should read her blog and then your own. i know we all have our own styles but you gotta applaud professional bloggers like her. really impressive, and entertaining.

yet another boring post right. in case you all still don't get my tone, i'm kinda moodless and irritable. it's a good thing s'pore bans pte ownership of weapons. if not i'm so damn sure ppl will attempt to gun me down. the thing is, i've read many blogs. and i'm darn sure i won't be the first to die.